Do you think narcissists care about you when they come back? The answer is simple: no. A narcissist comes back because they want to maintain their power over you and control you as long as possible. Many people are in Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) relationships, but they don’t know until they see its signs. A person with NPD has an exaggerated sense of self-importance; they lack empathy and require constant admiration from others.
In this blog, we are going to talk about why narcissists come back after discarding you. We will also talk about how you can use the no-contact rule on narcissists to get your life back on track.
The Cycle of A Narcissist’s Abuse
There are tw
o essential terms that every person who is in a narcissistic relationship must understand. These terms are narcissistic abuse and narcissistic disorder. Narcissistic abuse is a kind of emotional abuse, and it happens when the abuser only cares about themselves. They will always try manipulating their partners using words and actions.
A narcissist discard happens when the person who has narcissistic tendencies ends their relationship with their partner. Their partner will feel like they have been used and discarded. After the narcissist has discarded you, you will be confused at first. However, you still be hoping for their comeback even after knowing all the abuse and manipulation you have endured.
You must know that narcissists do not come back because they care about you and love you. A narcissist comes back to get control over you and maintain their power over you.
What is Narcissistic Supply?
A person with narcissistic tendencies thinks of themselves as superior to others and always wants to be adored and admired. Furthermore, they have an exaggerated sense of self-importance. A narcissist feeds on these feelings through a method known as narcissistic supply.
They use the narcissistic supply to feel and get admiration, applause, and affirmation from others. Narcissists always want to control others and seek the person who will give them the exact reactions that they are seeking. Many experts say that narcissists get boosts on predictable responses.
If the reactions satisfy them, they will continue this behavior. They will only stop when they can no longer exert control over the person they want to. Friends and associates can be the supplies of a narcissist, but the main supplier is a partner or a family member. A narcissist can have many suppliers, including friends and associates. But their main suppliers are those closest to them, like a family member or partner.
The Role of Old Relationships & Supplying Narcissists
Narcissists often come back to their old relationships to get the narcissistic supply. They will only stop until they no
longer get what they desire the most…attention. Returning to old relationships proves that the narcissist is still in control of power over their partner. They will not leave until they enforce their ability to ensure the target person is still under control.
Most of the time, a narcissist lacks confidence, and they are not sure about their sense of self. This insecurity can lead to certain behaviors and make them seek validation from others. To get this validation, a narcissist always moves towards old relationships. They will claim that they have changed and corrected the mistakes that ended their old relationship to get validation from their partner.
Using No-Contact Rule with Narcissists
All the narcissists who are in relationships will manage to find their way to get their partner under their control. If their partner implements a no-contact rule, the narcissist will get hurt. The narcissist is hurt because no one is paying attention to them. So, you have to use the no-contact phase time to heal yourself and focus on completing recovery. This opportunity will give you enough time to improve your mental health with self-care.
We Are Here To Help
About Shantel Wise – Narcissistic Abuse Recovery & Relationship Coach
Shantel Wise is a relationship coach who specializes in helping women recover from narcissistic relationships, overcome patterns of people-pleasing and codependency, and build emotionally healthy relationships. Her work focuses on helping women rebuild confidence, establish healthy boundaries, and develop deeper intimacy in relationships after experiencing emotional manipulation or narcissistic abuse.
Through compassionate guidance and practical tools, Shantel supports women who want to break unhealthy relationship cycles and move toward relationships built on trust, respect, and emotional safety.
If you have been struggling with people-pleasing, codependency, or the lasting effects of narcissistic abuse, coaching can help you gain clarity, rebuild your confidence, and create healthier relationship patterns.
