Has Anxiety Been Blocking Your Success?

A while back I posted a video by Will Smith where he talks about his confrontation with fear and anxiety.  Smith described himself to be out socializing with some friends when the idea to go skydiving came up.  At first glance, this really seemed like a great idea. His friends were very excited about the idea of making the trip.  At the time everyone, Smith included was excited and confident about the experience at the point of conversation.  He described a radical shift in his mood and tone once he returned home, settled down from the adrenaline rush of socializing with his friends, and had to face the sobering reality of what he had committed to.  As Smith discovered that he had not quite thought out his decision to go skydiving, a rush of anxiety began to flood him as he imagined all of the negative possibilities that could occur if things did not go right once he jumped from the plane.


Defeat Before Trial

How many times have you experienced the same type of terror and anxiety when you began to think about following through with something you have committed to.  Maybe you agreed to do a small presentation on your job, or at church.  Perhaps it was that anxiety that you experienced in your marriage, the anxiety you had when it was time to confront your spouse about not wanting to go on the trip with the in-laws.  In these types of situations, fear can often paralyze us because of our Anxiety and Our Obsession About What Others Think.  What is it about certain situations that often arouse the most heightened levels of fear and anxiety even at the mere thought of confrontation? Why is it that we can often find ourselves being anxious so far in advance of the “come to Jesus” conversation.

 Why Fear Before The Fear Provoking Experience?

The anxiety that is often provoked in anticipation of one’s confrontation with fear (the fear-provoking event), is often what Smith describes as being irrational.  As Will Smith describes his skydiving experience he states, “why were you scared in your bed the night before. What do you need that fear for?… Why could you not enjoy breakfast…everything up to the stepping out, there’s no reason to be scared!”  He spoke about the actual skydiving experience to be somewhat of a surprise considering that the most feared moment that could be imagined, the moment that the jump occurred, ended up being the most blissful elevating experience that could have ever happened.

Smith‘s description of bliss parallels with the experience that we have when we learn to take our power back.  As long as we stand on the side planning, anticipating, countering before the strike, we hold ourselves hostage from the bliss of being whom we are, saying what matters to us, and feeling that we have taken a stand.  We deprive ourselves of confidence, self-acceptance, and success because of the anxiety of things that may never happen.

Smack Fear In The Face

Fear has two strong components that compound the anxiety experienced in anticipation of scary situations.  These two components are crucial in keeping us from success. The first component is the anticipation of the fear-provoking event, and secondly the actual fear-provoking event.  Maybe we can justify to a degree having fear and anxiety about an actual event or confrontation.  But what is there to justify our fear leading up to the fear-provoking experience.

Is there really anything to be afraid before the interview, before the talk about the breakup.  Is there anything to justify fear for the time in between now and the first date? Consider taking a slice off of the anxiety experience.  Maybe a small change in the way that you approach a fear-provoking situation might be the break that is needed to stand up and face fear dead in the face, with no reserve and remove fear off of the premises.


About Choya

LICSW Social Work Licensure Supervisor and Mental Health Counselor in Huntsville, AL 35806

Choya Wise is the owner of Aspire Counseling and Consulting Services a mental health clinic in the Huntsville, Al area.  As a licensed mental health professional Choya specializes in individual counselingcouples therapy, and depression counseling.  He also offers Social Work Supervision in Alabama and Anger Management Classes.

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1955 Rideout Dr. Ste 400
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